Leaky Pipes?
by The Dark Lady Chaos
Summary: In which the beginning of Tom Riddle's takeover required naught but water droplets from the supposed heavens above. Who knew? In his defense of the strangeness of it it was Harry's idea.


**Disclaimer:** I dont own Harry Potter, just this specific fanfic idea.

It had been a particularly blustery and stormy year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, where thunder shook the roots of the earth and rain pelted the castle walls, water found its way into mysterious places, dripped down to splash on the ground making strange noises and leaving wet marks. Leaks. The kind of leaks that were endless but yet seemed not to have any point of origin at all. And so it was that filch the caretaker found himself running round the school with pails, buckets, and teacups to catch dripping water. Yelling was heard, students were magically soaked, stress was high, and Albus Dumbledore was tired of being shouted at by numerous members of his staff. Where such water was leaking from in a castle waterproofed by magic no one quite knew. Perhaps it was the castle and her mischievous trickery, or maybe the sinks had been left running too long, (rumor was strong that the Weasley twins had been up to something as well,) but in the end, none of this so much as mattered to the late great Apple Strudel Dundersnore who was always kept perfectly safe and dry from the dreaded sounds of water droplets in his head office, (though that didn't save his ears from Minerva's yelling.) The head of heads, naturally he would be protected with his lemon drops the worth of gold, (to him at least.) That would soon be changed.

_Drip…. drip…. drip…._

Of course it would be The headmaster's lucky day to discover that he wasn't quite as safe as first assumed.

He stared at the headmaster across the golden embroidery upon desk. Dumbledore stared back. His smaller companion occasionally drummed his fingers across said desk, face dull and slack as he fought a losing battle against the realm of dreams, having long ago given up on watching the match of wills between the two wizards beside him. He pulled his attention away from his companion and kept his eyes steady, fixed on half moon glasses, and broke the silence.

"I'm so sorry to have bothered you today headmaster. But I was in Hogsmeade today, and I noticed that you were in need of a Defense Professor."

_Drip…. drip…. drip…._

They continued to stare at each other, eyes locked in battle, the rest of their body pleasantly engaged in the luxury of casualty.

"How lucky of me my boy, for you to have been so near. I've been getting rather desperate as of late."

"I can't imagine the stress."

_Drip._

The smaller of the visitors rubbed at his eyes behind his glasses.

"Gods can you two stop mentally undressing each other I can feel the sexual tension from here."

Two pairs of eyes snapped to the smallest of them.

"Harry my boy—"

"Don't say that Harry, we're simply having a pleasant conversation."

The smallest of the group—Harry Potter—fell silent once again, quickly giving up his attempt at speeding through the conversation in favor of watching the pursuit of a water droplet slide down the nearest wall. Dumbledore's smile looked forced for a moment as his gaze was caught in the droplet's enchanting progress, but he soon turned to the other once more, and continued jovially like nothing had interrupted.

"Yes yes," he said almost mournfully, "the anxiety levels of the staff have been shooting up this past week."

_Drip…. drip drip…._

Dumbledore plastered a smile on his face as another water droplet fell from the newly apparent heavens of his office.

"Dreadful," replied the other.

"Indeed," said Dumbledore.

_Driiiiiiip….. drip drip drip driiiiiiip…._

"I apologize if I'm being rude headmaster but does there seem to be a leakage problem in your office?"

Dumbledore's plastered smile of grandfatherly casualty became just a bit faker.

"No no. Just the rain outside."

Harry glanced out the window, "It's not raining."

"Old water that's gathered at the top of the castle to drain my dear boy, not to worry."

The other looked at Harry dryly, Harry tried his hand at acting and pretended not to notice.

"Well Sir, do I get the job? I sent you the application form previously along with my OWLS and NEWTS."

Dumbledore once more stared into the face of the other intently.

"No."

"No? Do I not have the right credentials?"

"Oh no no. It's simply the fact that…. you're much too young my boy."

Harry didn't bother to pretend this time, he looked at his companion, who stared back, the incredulous looks present on their faces possible to be misunderstood only by the genial man before them.

"But don't fret my boy! You'll be old enough in a few years I'm sure!"

"Sir…" the other started, "I'm seventy five years old."

Dumbledore 'gaped' in his furiously manipulative astonishment.

"Why you don't look a day over twenty five!"

"How kind of you sir. I dare say you don't look a day over a hundred."

Dumbledore clapped at this.

"Why thank you dear child, it is nice to be complimented now and then."

Harry decidedly ignored the fact that the other wasn't complimenting the headmaster at all.

"I'll fix the water problem for you," the other said.

At this Dumbledore froze, decision faltered.

_Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip._

"Well…."

"I'll ensure that it stays fixed."

If only the strange water had waited a second longer, because in the next moment, the felled sound of it and it's brethren made the Headmaster's choice for him.

_Driiiip drip drip!_

"Oh alright. You may have the job."

The other smiled warmly, the expression a bit crooked on his face, like the muscles weren't quite used to the action. It was still impossible to say it wasn't charming.

Tom held out his hand.

"It's been a pleasure doing business with you Headmaster Dumbledore."

The old headmaster took the hand firmly and shook, dread already pooled in his stomach.

"The pleasure was all mine Mr. Riddle."

Harry and Tom exited the castle after easily, the taller of the two grinning shark like.

"Do you think that he'll ever figure out how to remove your leaky curse on the castle?"

"Why Harry do doubt me?"

Harry grinned, "Why Tom would I do such a thing?"

The two men smiled widely at each other.

And that is the story of how Tom Riddle and Harry Potter began the take over of Hogwarts with nothing other than their brains and mysterious water.

"Who knew that all we needed was a few well placed leaky pipes!?"

AN: Reviews are wppreciated! Thanks for reading.


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